清明祭

那天晚上，梦到大舅了。
只是模样有些不同，眉毛很粗，脸上也棱角分明。
但并不觉得凶。
其实大舅性格很和善，眉毛也不粗，方型脸但并没什么棱角。
大舅过世已有几年了。

大舅死得很不幸。
据说是吃了晚饭，带着我表弟五六岁的儿子骑自行车要出村。
的晚上外面常常伸手不见五指，忽然疾驶过来一辆摩托车，正撞在大舅的自行车上。
大舅当时就不行了，所幸表弟的儿子只是头皮擦破了，其他无碍。
那个骑摩托的人是他们的同村，当时刚喝过酒。
我很为大舅惋惜，他去世时才五十多岁吧！而且那是在乡下，不像城市这样车水马龙凶险四伏。
大舅竟然是被摩托车撞死！苍天无眼！

大约过了十余天，我又梦到了外婆。
外婆是我儿时最亲近的人，一位很能干、很干净的乡下老太太。
梦里具体什么场景记不清了，好像货架上摆有许多清菜，外婆一样样捡点着，似乎要送给我。
我没有要，因为在大城市里我并不缺这些。

外婆是在大舅之前去世的，也有许多年了。
外婆活了七八十岁，也算喜丧吧。
记得很小时候，外婆曾逗我说：“再疼你也没用，等外婆老了，是指望不上你的。
”那时候我应该是暗下决心将来要照顾外婆的。
可是实事却让外婆不幸言中，成年后的我久居北京，拖家带口为生计奔波，无暇去看望故乡卧病在床的外婆，更别说亲自去照顾她老人家了。

甚至，外婆过世时我也不曾回去看一看。
我是从母亲那里得到的消息。
母亲安慰我说：“你在北京太忙，所以没有通知你回来。
”知道母亲是为我着想，假如外婆地下有知，她也会原谅我吧？只是这种种的错失，已成为我心中永久的遗憾，再无法弥补。

前两日打电话给在河南的母亲，把我近期梦到外婆和大舅的事说了。
母亲浅浅地笑，她可能是为我还记着外婆和大舅而欣慰。
我说：“清明节快到了吧？”母亲说：“是啊，等到了清明节，我会去给他们烧些纸。
”

清明时节雨纷纷，路上行人欲断魂。
清明节去祭奠逝去的亲人，古已有之。
我们不能说这是封建迷信，而是活着的人对逝去的亲人表达情感的一种方式。
清明即至，我不能回故乡去祭奠外婆和大舅，只能写下上面的文字，以寄托哀思。

愿我们逝去的亲人，在天堂里安息！

Introduce:That day in the evening, the dream arrived to husband's father greatly.
Just about is a little different, brow is very thick, on the face also edges and corners is trenchant.
But do not feel fierce.
Disposition of big mother's brother is very actually genial, brow is not thick also, square model face but and edges and corners of it doesn't matter.
Big mother's brother dies to already had a few years.
Big mother's brother dies very unfortunately.
Was to eat dinner allegedly, the son that is taking my cousin 56 years old should go a village by bicycle.
Of the country often stretch his hand not to see the five fingers outside in the evening, drive quickly suddenly come over an autocycle, bumping on the bicycle of big mother's brother.
Big mother's brother is washed-up at that time, the son of place favour cousin is scalp rub only, other without hinder.
That rides the person of motor is them to be the same as a village, just had drunk wine at that time.
I very for big mother's brother regretful, the ability when he dies more than 50 years old! And that is in the country, unlike city such heavy traffic in a extremely dangerous state 4 bend over.
Big mother's brother is actually be bumped into dead by autocycle! Blue sky does not have an eye! Passed more than 10 days about, I the dream arrived grandmother.
Grandmother is me when the closest person, a very very able, clean countryside old lady.
Specific what setting is written down in the dream not clear, seem place on goods shelves have a lot of clear food, appearance collects light like grandmother, want to send me it seems that.
I did not want, because be in big city,I am not short of these.
Grandmother dies before big mother's brother, also have make old.
Grandmother lived 779 years old, also calculate happy funeral.
Write down very in one's childhood, grandmother ever amused me to say: "Be fond of you again trashy also, substandard old woman is old, it is a hope do not go up your.
" awaiting me in those days should be dark be determined want to take care of grandmother in the future.
But real issue lets grandmother misfortune call the turn however, I after manhood am long house Beijing, mouth of belt pulling the home is bread to rush about, be too busy to visit the grandmother that birthplace is ill abed, more fasten act as a matchmaker to patronize her a respectful form of address for an old person oneself.
Even, when grandmother dies, I never also go back have a look.
I am from the information that gets over there the mother.
The mother comforts me to say: "You are in Beijing too busy, did not inform you come back so.
" know the mother is to be my consider, if grandmother underground has,know, can she also excuse me? It is this only a variety of delinquency, already became the permanent regret in my heart, cannot make up for again.
Before two days phone the mother in Henan, said dream of my near future to the thing of grandmother and big mother's brother.
The mother laughs shallowly, she may be to be me to still be being written down grandmother is gratified with big mother's brother.
I say: "Was tomb-sweeping day gotten on for? " the mother says: "Be, when tomb-sweeping day, I can burn some of paper to them.
" rain of Pure Brightness season in succession, the pedestrian on the road is about to break spirit.
Tomb-sweeping day goes the family member with parting hold a memorial ceremony for, ancient already had.
We cannot say this is feudal superstition, however living person conveys affective to parting family member a kind of means.
Pure Brightness comes namely, I cannot return home9337