流血的幸福作者:去看海吧

我叫沙。
一个傻瓜。

确切的说，本来不是傻瓜的，爱上了她之后才是。

两年了！每天到了华灯初上，万籁俱寂的时候，我就会装作若无其事的走同一条路，七绕八绕的走到她门口。

可是，这个时候，如果有人能注意我的话，一定会看到我那狂热的眼睛，和身体兴奋的抖动。

也许，我应该再表白的一遍。
望着她的窗户，我暗暗的想。
呵呵，两年前有过了一个鼓足了3个月的勇气的表白。
。
惨痛的回忆又涌了上来：

她仿佛听到什么非常有趣的事一样，似笑非笑得看着我，可是眼睛里却是掩饰不住的轻蔑。

是的！我不过是个很穷的傻小子，没有沉甸甸的钱包和拉风的跑车，长相平凡，个子也矮，没有任何特点，没有任何地方能吸引她这样一个骄傲的公主一样的出众女孩。

她真的没有说一句话，就那么走开了。
可是，意思却是不言而喻--

别做梦了！

可是我的梦却每天都在继续热烈的燃烧着。

于是，我每天都来到这同一个地方，看着她的窗户，看着她出出入入，看着各式各样的男孩和男人出出入入，看到拥抱和接吻。
有的时候，还能听到她妩媚的笑声，调情的语调，一浪高过一浪。

是的，各位看官恐怕也知道，我的心很痛。
每次都是，今天也是。

于是，我又从怀里摸出那一把已经痕迹斑斑的小刀。

是的，她永远的也不可能爱我，可是我永远都不能不爱她！

好痛！刀用力在左腕上划下去，发出刺啦的一声。

每天都是同一个地方，也许，今天已经划在骨头上了吧。
我落寞的想。
天亮之前，怎么都是要回去的，唉，明天再来吧。
兴许，哪天我鼓足了勇气，会进去去见她吧。

左手渐渐已经没有感觉了，没有一滴血流出来。

真怀念那有血能流出来的时候啊，仿佛流出的血，能带走我对她的想念似的。
。
。

呵呵，原来流血也会是一种不可得到幸福。

“苏沙，男。
待业青年。
死亡时间：2011年12月23日。
类别：自杀。
死因：左手腕被割破，失血过多。
”

Introduce:I call sand.
Goofy.
Say exactly, not be goofy originally, after falling in love with her, ability is.
Two years! Arrived everyday at the beginning of colorfully decorated lantern on, all is quiet when, I can pretend of as if nothing happened go same a road, 7 circle 8 circle take her entrance.
But, this moment, if somebody can notice me, regular meeting sees the eye of my that fanaticism, shake excitedly with the body.
Perhaps, when I should profession again.
Looking at her window, I secretly want.
Ah, two had have a strike before New Year sufficient of the courage of 3 months profession.
.
Bitter memory emerged again: She ases if like hearing the thing with absorbing what, smile a thin smile so that look at me, what but be however in the eye,do not conceal is contemptuous.
Yes! I am nevertheless very poor foolish boy, without the purse of heavy and the racing bike that pull wind, appearance is ordinary, stature is short also, without any characteristics, can not attract her anyplace the conspicuous girl like a such proud princesses.
She did not say a word really, so went away.
But, the meaning is self-evident however- - did not daydream! But my dream is continueing everyday however,enthusiastic combustion is worn.
Then, I come to this everyday same a place, look at her window, look at her to give discrepancy to enter, look at sundry boy and man to give discrepancy to enter, see hug and kiss.
When having, still can hear her enchanting laughter, flirting dialect, one billow crosses one billow high.
Yes, everybody sees an official be afraid also know, my heart is very painful.
It is every time, today also is.
Then, I feel that one from the bosom again already the penknife with full of stains or spots trace.
Yes, she forever impossible also love I, but I have to love her forever! Very painful! The knife delimits on left wrist forcibly go down, give out thorn.
It is same everyday a place, perhaps, had delimited today went up in bone.
Of my desolate want.
Before day, how should go back, alas, will come again tomorrow.
Maybe, which days of my beat became sufficient courage, can go in go seeing her.
Left hand had not felt gradually, come out without a blood stream.
When true yearning has blood to be able to flow then ah, as if gore, can take away me to be missed to hers like.
.
.
Ah, bleeding so also can be a kind of not attainable happiness.
"Su Sha, male.
Youth waiting for employment.
Dead time: On December 23, 2011.
Category: Commit suicide.
Cause of death: Left hand wrist by lacerate, exsanguine and overmuch.
Exsanguine and overmuch.
.
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